jus reach home from a movie wit weijun.
went down to pasir ris jus to eat superdog!
his idea la.
he was gd enough to accompany mi.
he knew my mood wasnt reali gd.
we took neoprints too.
suddenly rmb my past wit ex and gfs takin noeprints.
hahax.
when i am jus feeling slightly better.
my tupid hand took up my phone to see the sms he send mi.
but weijun noe i goin emoing lerx.
try to make mi feel better.
baby will understand mummy de rite.
mummy love u nore then anione else.
wanna see u more then anithing else.
i have alreadi prepare for the worst.
so in case anithing happen.
at least he will still lead a better life.
i am sure nobody love u more then mi except for ur parents.
but i hope u noe.
i longed to go back to the past.
but i noe i did alot of thing that make u irritate.
and u did alot of thing to make mi upset too.
there is no turnin point for us ler.
if i have a choice i still wan to let u have our baby.
but u are still not showin mi that u are ready to be a daddy.
ppl are tellin mi.
i am still the prettiest mum now.
they jus wanna see my smile.
i fake my smile to all of them.
but to u.
i smile becos is u.
lookin at ppl, a dadddy a mummy and a baby outside walkin.
u noe.
i hope we can be like this too.
but i noe.
now whatever i may say is all nonesence to u.
sry to everything i hurt u.
but a few more days later.
i owe u nth ler.
half of mine thing will eventualli become urs.
maybe is enough for ur whole life.
this is all i can return u.
this is all i can do for u.
i will still wanna tell the whole world.
is my honor havin u by myside for 5 months.
thanks for being by myside makin mi smile.
i do regret at all.
my most wonderful love.
8 more days lerx.
my appointment wit our baby.
and a days shorten to have him ler.
mummy left mi a car which she wanted to give mi straight after i got my licence.
i only noe it from the lawyer.
sam cried while we was on the phone ystd nite.
he say he didnt wanna lose mi.
but alot of thing money cant buy de my dear.
he wanted a day from mi for the last time.
i agree to this date.
he likes mi for so long.
2 or 3 yrs ler ba.
but i never did anithing from him.
derrick wanted mi to go oversea wit him.
which make this two frenx havin a small agurement.
i onli have 1 body, 2 leg and hands.
hahax.
to sam and derrick.
u both should noe why i didnt wanna be tgt wit both of u.
yrs back i may have times that i thought of acceptin either one.
rmb once, u both gave a tupid idea of i have both of u as my bf.
monday, wed, friday for one.
tues, thurs and sat for the other one.
sunday my off day.
that time i truely thought that will be perfect.
hahax.
but both of u are important to mi still.
i may hurt others but i won hurt u two.
but for yrs.
we maintain a gd frenx relationship.
thx for understandin mi.
nobody love mi more then u two.
if i have a chance of surviving.
i promise i will try acceptin either one of u all rite.
the whole world may hurt mi but onli u two will stand by my.
protectin mi.
is a difficult choice.
but i will do what i promise.
okie.
silly two.
i am sorry i scolded sam darling.
my baby could onli have a father.
but thx for offering.
i may consider.
hahax.
u reali could be a gd daddy.
oh no!
i cant say this.
derrick darling will get offended!
hahax.
is fun if we could be like this forever.
u two noe mi best.
one look from mi u all will noe what i wan.
my heart now is broke into alot of part.
give mi more time to accept a new relationship ba.
jus talk to them on the phone.
i called them and say i wanna go sam hse tml.
derrick wanna come pick mi up to his hse now.
tupid boi.
i say tml rite.
hahax.
but end up he decided to camp tonite in sam hse ler.
pls don let mi choose whose car to sit tml ler.
ask uncle paul drive u all ba. okie.
i will sit in the middle okie.
fair enough.
goin for spa wit mummy tml ba.
then maybe goin office find daddy olso.
needa go derrick hse see uncle too.
that is my plan for tml ba.
makin myself real busy and try not to think about him.
forgettin how he look now.
forgettin how his smile.
but one word from him reali will move my heart back to his direction.
so no more ler!
xuemin jia you=)
xuemin
take mi away
♥xuemin
♥BABY PRINCESS(11.7 WEEKS) 20 MAY 2009
